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ShooshTime
Shoosh Time! The word 'shoosh' and girls usually don't mix up because it indicates some domestic abuse, which is precisely what's been happening in my house for years. I'm used to hearing this word because I often imagine that that's what ThePornDude would tell me if we ever met in person. But, if we're talking about some fun, and some great porn, you'll discover that ShooshTime.com is a fantastic site that you can definitely get used to. My name is the PornGeek, and we will be reviewing this site together today, so buckle up and prepare yourselves!
The homepage and my first impression of this site
ShooshTime.com brands itself as a free amateur porn site, but it doesn't look that way. With the site being mostly blank, and the videos being placed right at the very center of the site, it seems more like a news portal and much less like your average porn site. One thing that also makes it look like that is the fact that they used the disgusting combination of black and orange. They say orange is the new black, but I say that this design is pure shit. That doesn't affect the quality of their content, though, and this is just my personal opinion. And usually, nobody respects my judgments, and people always say that I run my mouth way too much. They also often say that I should stop doing that before getting my teeth kicked in inside of my mouth. And I listen to them because I'm aware that I'm not strong enough to take on the haters, even if they were in middle school. I hope kids in middle school don't consume porn, though, that's what undoubtedly ruined me and my chances of having a prosperous life.Navigation on ShooshTime.com
One thing about ShooshTime.com that I like is its navigation system. As I've previously said, the site is mostly blank, meaning that you won't get a thousand unnecessary and shitty options to make the site more engaging. And I think that ShooshTime.com doesn't need to do this because it is a free site after all. One thing that I've realized through my experiences was that usually, only premium sites fill their feeds with crap to attract more audience. And it's generally like that in real life too! People who have zero personality will dress in flashy clothes, or they'll always talk loudly and try to silence you, just because of their complexes. Maybe I don't have the guts to speak loudly, because I know that I'll get beaten, but I still like to wear colorful shirts, because that way people might pay attention to me. Unfortunately, it's not the kind of attention I wanted, if you know what I mean. One thing that's confusing is that when you place your cursor on their videos section, tags and categories pop up. Now, ShooshTime.com, why would you do this? You already have a full section dedicated to categories, which we will thoroughly discuss later. But anyways, besides the videos, you can also find picture galleries that are mostly gifs, which is cool, because if you like a specific scene and it makes you nut, you can repeat it all you want. That only happens when you become so experienced in porn that regular, long videos bore you to death. Unfortunately, that level of experience is followed by specific side effects that I've been noticing in myself. For example, an ugly, scarred, and tired dick. Some of the others are your general lack of friends, nonexistent love life, and family problems as well. Plus judgment. And a lot of judgment. Other things that you can find on ShooshTime.com are mostly categories and porn stars. Now that's okay! But what I don't like is how they have at least 7-8 options on their site, and like 3-4 of them are just stuff that redirects you to completely different websites. I get that that's the way ShooshTime.com makes money, but still, maybe fill the site with a couple more ads. Don't make me hope for something, and then just redirect me to some shitty looking site that I know I won't enjoy no matter how hard I try. It's the same with girls and me, for fuck's sake! Why would I even try to get in their panties when I know right at the start that I would just disappoint them? It doesn't make any sense. Just like me dreaming about being successful like ThePornDude, it's not going to happen, man.The perks and the content
The content is fire, and it's ShooshTime.com's biggest perk at the same time. I mean since you already get the site for free. If you're tired of seeing professional porn videos with all their fake bullshit, then stay on this site and watch Kyle and Karen get frisky in the bedroom. It's possible, the videos are great, the player is practical and straightforward to use, and you also have the option of downloading the videos. You can also interact with other users by posting comments and expressing your thoughts about these videos. I very rarely comment on videos, just because I know that people are not interested in my opinions. The only reason you stupid fucks read these in the first place is that you like to laugh at my sob stories, and you enjoy the content that I'm advertising on my site. While the truth is that there's probably a significant percentage of you with lives very similar to my own. I know that nobody can be as pathetic as me at certain times, but you're still not much better than me. Do you have a girlfriend? Ha-ha, that's cool. Just wait till my mega masturbator 9000 comes in the mail. I don't have to ask or beg for it to let me hit it. I only bought it, so I don't have to use my hand anymore, that shit hurts.The categories and porn stars
As far as the categories go, it's actually pretty easy to use them. Just click on the category that you want, and then enjoy the videos in it. Right now, I'll click on MILF to show you how it's done. The reason why I clicked on this specific category is that I can relive all those fantasies that I have about my teachers and my aunt. You know, the one I already talked about? The one that's giving me mixed signals? Well, I swear, one day I'll get in her panties. I just hope it's not when she turns eighty, even though I'll gladly do her even if she was an old hag like my grandma. It's the same as when I talked about the content. Click on a particular category on ShooshTime.com that you want, and then choose a video that you want to watch. And from then, it's all the same. You can like it, dislike it, comment on it, and you can download it as well. And all of that without even registering. All though I recommend it since they do give you all of this content and these great options free of charge. It's like they're doing a public service. The same kind of service that the police did when they arrested my father for 'possession of illegal substances.' He's still in jail. This happened a couple of days ago. I don't know what's going to happen, but I'm already maximally emasculated, so a father figure isn't of such high importance in my life anymore as it used to be. As far as the porn stars go, that won't take that much explaining. There's a list of porn stars on ShooshTime.com. Just find the one you like, and take it from there. A simple process, that's it. I know that I'm going to spend my whole day on this site as soon as I'm finished with this review, because they have fire content, and it caters to my fantasies. Oh, lord, ThePornDude would surely tell me that I'm the biggest loser in the world right now. And he'd probably be right, and I agree with him. God, I wish that he would teach me a couple of lessons on how to have more success and become a better man in life...Registration and conclusion
The registration process isn't complicated, either. Put in your information (you already know what every site asks you to write down), and from then on, you're free to use the site without any limits whatsoever. All in all, ShooshTime.com (often misspelled as "swooshtime", "sooshtime", "smooshtime" and "shoostime") is a fantastic site, and even though it looks disgusting, its practical side outweighs its flaws by far. I hope you enjoyed this review because I enjoyed this 'public humiliation confession session' too! I hope to do it again soon, just with less touching stories. Even though I know, it'll be the same every time. Goodbye, and enjoy your stay on this site!- Good content
- No ads
- It's free
- The design
- Half of the navigation options redirect you elsewhere
- The site looks boring
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