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Reblop
As the world evolves, so does porn. You see, every day there are less and less classical porn sites. There are portals, sites specified in nudes, hentai sites, sites with 3-D porn, and everything else. Not to mention sex games online. But, one thing that fascinates me and scares me at the same time are those websites created to look like news portals. And this site, Reblop.com, is exactly like those sites. But, who knows, before talking smack, I have to look around a bit and do my research. That's the same mistake I always made in school, you know?
Talking smack to the biggest dude during the holidays, thinking that I'm untouchable. And then, when the holidays end, I come back and get the shit beaten out of me. I was even close to meeting god a couple of times. My father always said that I'm a drama queen and that it was just a couple of punches. That I should be more robust. But he doesn't know what he's talking about. Just because he can handle blows and drugs, doesn't mean that he is a real man. I manage porn sites better, and I'm going to prove it right now. If I want to get to the level of ThePornDude, I have to do it, so bear with me. Let's go!
First impressions
As I've already mentioned in the intro, Reblop.com looks like a porn news site. I still have no idea whether it is, but we'll see that during the next sections — all in all, that always scared me. You know, I'm bad with my brain. I don't know how to use it, and I don't want to use it unless I absolutely have to, which is why I fell for this porn con in the long run. Porn gives you happy hormones while also allowing you not to think about shit. And I want it to stay that way. I don't want to have to continually calculate something and read a bunch of dumb stuff just so I could get a nice wank, you know? You get in, you touch your burned-out sausage, and then you get the hell out. That's my M.O, always been, is, and will be. But, my M.O can also stand for my moronic observations, because I always tend to do this. Give out some random conclusions about the site, and then they fail, and I realized I did it all wrong. So, now I won't do this. Besides the content in the middle, and the navigation at the top, Reblop.com does not have much to offer. Which is a good thing, less boring stuff for you. Except for the ads, of course, those are killing me. But they managed to keep it at the minimum.Navigation
Luckily, navigation on Reblop.com is not all that complicated. You have only four simple options, and that's it. And one of them is the homepage, which we just talked about in the first section of this review. Next up, we have some great porn bloopers, which is always a lovely sight. And the button is literally called 'porn bloopers.' Here, even though it's likely going to redirect you to a different site, you can see some exciting stuff. Funny behind-the-scenes of porn videos, and whatnot. It's almost like when a movie ends on the FOX channel, and then they play bloopers and stuff. Except, this is even cuter and quirkier because you can see a chick laughing her ass off with a cock right inside of her asshole. Unfortunately, I once caught my grandma in the same position, laughing her ass off because my uncle has a small penis. Family relations, what can I tell you. All of my siblings and blood-connected folks are deranged. Next thing on our list is porn. If you click on this button, Reblop.com will redirect you to a different site once again. That would be okay with me if the porn on that site didn't seem so shitty and shady. I fucking hate when they upload Snap-chat compilations of hoes sucking dick. And then they also brand it as some 'porn compilations' and whatnot. No, that's not porn, that's just a high school legal hoe sucking a dick in a public restroom. I've seen hoes sucking dicks in public restrooms. Of course, I always feel sorry for myself because I'm not the one getting the suction, but what can you do. You can't always get what you want. I never get anything else but insults and shitty food, occasionally. Not everyone is as successful and fulfilled as ThePornDude is.The perks
You see, the only perk on Reblop.com that you get is the lack of boredom and commitment. I mean, because you don't have to register to the site. But, that's cool, because you're getting all the content for free, whether it's good or not doesn't even matter. You can be like me, complaining all the time, with people hating you everywhere you go. Or, you can enjoy the content if you like it, or even leave the site if you don't. That's what ordinary people supposedly do, but I don't. Because I am not normal, of course. Anyways, that's just how it is. A lot of people sometimes complain like me about the lack of original content in this adult industry, but those same people aren't ready to pay. It's the same with music, essentially. 'Oh, musicians are selling out, nobody makes real music anymore.' But when a musician puts out a quality album and makes a show, people don't show up. They'd rather spend their ticket money on shitty weed and hang out at local parks with all the heroin addicts.The tags and trending videos
Now, this is where all the shit comes to the surface. And I'm not talking about me vomiting because I masturbated like twelve times today, no. I'm talking about some things that will make you rage as much as it made me. You see, on the right side of the site, you can find 'trending' videos and tags/categories, whatever you wanna call them. And the first one that I've seen is the Selena Gomez sex tape, nudes, whatever. I clicked on it, and everything I watched there was fake. Even the nudes are obviously photoshopped. I have the worst eyesight in the universe, but I'm not blind. I know when I'm being lied to. And that sucks because I was hoping for genuine content. You see, that's what I was talking about when I said that I hate porn sites organized like the news channel. The tags, however, are right below the trending videos. And when you click on one of them, you get a full list of articles connected to that same tag. Reblop.com at least did an excellent job on that. Of course, most of these articles are about celebrities, and they will be fake. But hey, maybe there is nothing wrong about that. Perhaps I'm a whiny faggot again. Maybe those jocks from my high school were right. But still, I'm obviously trying to relax a little bit, you know. So if you want to feed into your fantasies, I certainly won't try to stop you. Maybe I'll even join you. But not in a weird way, of course... And if you click on an article on Reblop.com, you'll see that it isn't even an article. Most of these are just collections of poorly edited pictures, and some videos here and there. Most of them are fake, but some of them are authentic, which I can respect. It's hard to collect real celebrity porn. So you have to do what you have to do to make some money, right? That's why I'm writing these in the first place! To make some money for ramen noodles and rotten tomatoes.Registration and conclusion
As I've previously said, this is a porn news portal, so you don't have to register. That leaves us with a conclusion then! You see, I went to a doctor the other day, to get some things checked. My mom didn't want to let me, but I snuck out when she wasn't looking. He told me that I have more estrogen in my body than your usual male. And that's when it all hit me! So then I realized how bad I am with goodbyes. But, it comes for all of us, so let me conclude my review, huh. All in all, even though there is some fake porn around on Reblop.com, the site is pretty good. The organization is excellent and straightforward, and you can actually browse in peace, as you would on a, let's say furniture site.- Good organization
- Easy to browse
- No unnecessary options
- Shitty content
- A horrendous design
- Obvious clickbait articles
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