XVR Chat

Welp, it’s another webcam chat site. Another brand new day! The birds are chirping, my neighbors are coughing up all the meth from last night, and I’m wiping the blood from my nose because I felt sick the whole previous night. All in all, it’s a beautiful day, and it’s a brand new chance to feel sad and lost once again. But, that’s just how it is, and the job has to keep moving. Anything for that insignificant money that doesn’t mean anything. Unless you have a woman in your life and a happy life overall. But, if we’re already focusing on the business, then let me tell you a bit about Xvr.chat.

It’s a webcam chat site, where you can find the loveliest ladies on the internet, and you can text with them, or organize video chats. It works well for VR equipment, too, so it will feel more realistic. If you have VR equipment, that means that you can fool yourself for like fifteen minutes more. The only difference between you and me is that I’ll realize that my life still sucks fifteen minutes earlier — nothing less, and nothing more. But let’s move on to the review, shall we? At least before I lose my patience with another day once again.

Homepage

At first, the only thing that you get on the homepage is a massive preview/ad hybrid that’s supposed to prepare you for the excitement that’s about to come. Right next to that, you have the registering option. But, if you scroll down online, you’ll see a bunch of cams, and that’s it. It reminds me of two things – first of all, it reminds me of all those pop song videos that you used to see back in the day on MTV. And those videos always made me sad, because the guys in them were literal genetic perfection, and here I am.

Unable to move in the morning, eyes all watery from sleeping because they burned last night from the computer. Dick is itching me from all the masturbation, Cheetos crumbs all over my fucking shirt, and whatnot. You know, just the state of life. And the homepage also reminds me of a neat list of girls, kind of like those creepy movies where they sell them to billionaires all across the internet — ordering a bride from Russia and shit. Other than that, Xvr.chat’s homepage does not have that much to offer.

Navigation

Xvr.chat’s options are okay since you only have like three of them anyways. The first one being the filter, where you can pick what models you want to see, and how you’re feeling today. Eh, I’m vanilla, let me pick females. Today I have homoerotic thoughts, let me pick the male ones. Eh, even freakier, give me a goddamn mix of those two, aka the shemale ones. And then, in the end, you also have couples. So, all in all, you have the whole set, and depending on how fucked up you are, you can choose exactly what you want to see. As I’ve already mentioned, it’s like a fucking black market epidemic out there, but that’s okay. Healthy people could never understand what it’s like to fall into this stupid crisis for porn, colored with all the cravings and urges, feeling like an inadequate retard. And even if you find a girl, you can’t control those urges, so you’ll end up disappointing her anyways. You can’t drink Viagra pills in secrecy. She’ll notice one day.

The next option is only live cams. So if you want to see a real girl doing naughty stuff at the moment, then Xvr.chat’s got you covered. That option does not do anything else besides tricking you into thinking that you’re less alone now, because you’re sharing a moment with another person. The only problem is that that person doesn’t give a shit about you, because she only wants your money, aka tokens on this site. And even if I hired a cam girl for a private hour, I’d probably fucking propose to her since I do not know how to be socially adjusted, and my behavior has been deranged for years now.

And the third option on Xvr.chat is the reload option. In case you didn’t know that option- Just kidding my man, everyone knows what the fuck reload is, so I don’t even have to explain it. But, you can reload all you want, and so can I. Nothing is going to turn us into healthy and happy people unless we bite the bullet and do something good to change ourselves. I’m tired of living like this, but sometimes I don’t see another solution, and there’s no reload button in real life. If there were, I probably wouldn’t be writing about porn, but something much more substantial and valuable. And you’d probably quit reading these stupid reviews, and you’d do something useful with your life, you know? It’s just a cycle. Unfortunately, there’s no reload button. You have to fix the damage that’s already been made. And that’s a long and scary process.

The perks

Well, if we count the fantastic girls, then that’s a great perk that Xvr.chat possesses. But, if we take that out of the picture, then the only benefit that you get are those twenty fucking tokens that they hand out at the beginning, which would probably excite me like a couple of years ago, but not right now. I mean, you know, it’s just twenty tokens. You’ll click on them, and you’ll send them, then you’ll demand that the girl shows you her feet, and that’s it. Although the prices aren’t stable, and the cheapest thing is probably like fifty tokens or something, so yeah. Well, all in all, you can do whatever you want. I’m quite disappointed with the perks on this site, and I won’t spread lies about how amazing they are. But, if you’re going to see the girls and you want to be included in shows, you have to register, whatever the hell they’re demanding. We’re saving that for another section of the review, though.

The cams and the player

What I immediately noticed about Xvr.chat’s cams is how flashy do they look. The whole page is pitch black, except for some options for random things, and tip options. Like those are a bit blueish, purple, some gold was thrown in the mix too, you know. It reminds me of Casinos and stuff like that because it’s practically made with the same recipe. You’re supposed to get a hit of dopamine and adrenaline every time this chick takes her clothes off, and you’re supposed to give her your money converted into some stupid shit for that, and that’s it. You’re hooked, there’s nowhere to go, you can’t look back, your wife will divorce you, your children will hate you, and you will grow old and alone. That’s how I’ve always imagined my old days! Except for the fact that it’s hard to get a wife! And I think I’m already sterile from all the masturbation that I’ve been practicing through the years.

The player is okay, though. It’s immediately muted, so no one around you can hear what a weirdo you are, which is something good for people like me. The quality is okay as well, and the message bar next to it looks good too, except for dumb facial smileys that they invented for god-knows-what reason. And there’s a dude that’s lamer than me, sending messages to the cam girl and giving her like sixty tips in ten seconds, begging her to show him her boobs. The only problem that I have with Xvr.chat here is that they’re bugging me to register every ten seconds. Can’t you let a guy enjoy his cam shows?

Registration and conclusion

If you want to sign up for Xvr.chat, then know a couple of things. First of all, you get twenty tokens, which is somewhat cool if you’re still excited about crap like this. Next up, you can apply as an average human, as a cam model, or as a studio, so pretty much you have different and exciting options if you’re planning on making your money here.

Unfortunately, I’m too ugly to do that, so I’m stuck with writing these. But that’s okay too. I’m used to it. Anyways, if you’re applying like an average human that’s just reading this garbage, think of a nickname, then type your email and password and that’s it. If you’re a studio or a model, then think about your prospects first. All in all, the site’s good, the options aren’t complicated, and you can make money on Xvr.chat, so yeah. All in all, enjoy your hellish experience.