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DrTuber
Dr Tuber aka Dr. Tuber! I felt an incredible itching sensation around me penal area a few days ago. I was so miserable I could not sleep, could barely eat any of those delicious new pizza rolls my welfare check buys me, it was terrible. I couldn’t even finish watching Toriko for the sixth time! The shirtless men of Toriko would have to wait another day because I could not focus on anything!
Getting the bravery to tell mother about it, she told me to pull my pants down in front of her church group. At first, I thought she was crazy because this would unmask her as the villain she actually is to the gossiping elderly women of First Church of the Southern Baptists. But that was not the case! They all stopped what they were doing and turned to my embarrassing little penis!
Mother got out of her seat, took another drag from her already dwindled cigarette, and got on her knees. She grabbed my weenie and put the head up to her eyeball. “Still fucking small,” she said, snorting and dropping her cigarette on the floor. The other ladies of the church laughed so loud I thought mother’s framed pictures of Tom Selleck were going to fall off the walls!
“My…penis burns. It hurts really bad mother. I need a doctor I believe.”
“You believe,” said one woman. “You believe?!” She got out of her chair and walked over to me. “I’ll tell you what I believe,” she continued. The old lady slapped me in the penis so hard I fell over and began crying. “I believe you have third-degree burns on your little dingaling that’s what I believe!”
“Yes,” I tried to reply. The pain hurt so much, though! I could barely look up to acknowledge her. “Yes, my penis has burns on it. It hurts so bad mother please take me to the doctor.”
Everyone started laughing at me, acting as if it was the funniest thing they had ever heard. “It hurts really bad…” I tried to convince them.
“I got something that will help,” a nice old lady said, standing up out of her seat. “Just let me go get my purse.”
The room got quiet. Was this old nice lady finally actually going to help me? I was about to soon find out.
“Now clothes your eyes dear, I don’t want this to get into your eyes. Wait, yes I do!” She sprayed bear mace into my eyes, then all over my penis. I have never felt such pain in my entire life! They laughed so hard one of them had to go to the hospital for a stroke later that evening (the…I don’t say these words loosely, but…’the bitch,’ that sprayed me with bear mace); she died at 8:35 pm that evening; I hope she’s burning in hell.
I hitchhiked once again to the nearest doctor but this time naked and scared for my life. I didn’t think I would be attacked by a group of rabid elderly women that would only cause further injuries to my body. I had to do a lot of things to the truck driver I’m not willing to talk about but let’s just say I needed to get medicine for the STD I contracted that night.
Finally pulling up to the doctor’s office, I had to wait outside the rest of the evening because it was closed. I camped outside naked and cold, having to do more favors I’m not willing to discuss. This time it was for a homeless man in order to keep that spot and he smelled like raccoon feces (mother kept a family of raccoons in the house for years so I know the stench all too well).
I walked into the clinic and was immediately arrested for public indecency. I finally got to see a doctor in jail though and they confirmed I did have third-degree burns. I thought it was from masturbating too much without lubricant. “That could be one of the underlying issues, sir,” said the prison doctor. “These marks look more like…you have been…how do I say this…”
“Just say it, doctor, I can take it.”
“It looks like someone put a blowtorch on your…penis. And if I’m being honest your penis is so small I don’t know how one would accurately place the blowtorch on the penis without harming your tiny testicles. It’s really…impressive,” he said, licking his lips and staring me in the eyes. “Here. Take my card. I’m going to make your bail. Get out and call me because I want to…well you’ll see.”
So it wasn’t such a bad day after all! I finally got to go to the doctor, I figured out applying a blowtorch to my genitals does, in fact, harm me, I was bailed out before mother even knew what happened, and the best part? I made a friend!
I must have had doctors on the brain that afternoon because I snuck into the basement, got on my trusty desktop, and began searching for the doctor’s address so I could surprise him with a visit. I never found his name, but I did find a site called Drtuber. It’s a free tube site that turned out to be just what the doctor ordered. *Cocks head, smirks, and giggles* let’s take a look at it together!
Choose from straight, gay, transsexual from the homepage
As you all know, people like myself and alphas like ThePornDude are as straight as Zeus’ lightning bolts he uses to smite his enemies. I’m also a male feminist and a white knight that believes in including everyone so it’s nice to see that Drtuber offers different types of porn to be displayed immediately from the homepage. Whether you are gay or transsexual, Drtuber gives you the option to allow only those types of videos to appear on the homepage so you don’t have to search for it every time you go to the site. I love that sites like Drtuber are sensitive to other people’s sexual orientation. There is nothing I hate worse than going to a free tube site only to see nothing but scat videos. I imagine that is how gay men view a female’s vagina so it’s a good move on Drtuber’s part that they don’t have to see a vagina once while on the site: only weiners, waxed testicles, and shaven buttholes. How forward-thinking, Drtuber!Good sorting options
Drtuber offers an array of sorting options that is certain to help you to find the most sought after women to uplift. I enjoy sorting by, ‘newest,’ so I can be the first to compliment the lovely ladies on any site but you may prefer another option. If so, Drtuber lest you sort by the longest videos if you want to only view full-length videos as well as top-rated videos (today, this week, this month, all-time). Drtuber can also sort by the most commented videos (again, today, this week, this month, all-time). That’s a feature you don’t see on a lot of free tube sites but it’s one I would like to see on more. It gives me a chance to be a pure white knight voice in a sea of Chads that just want to hump the ladies in these videos. Seriously, Chads need to get a life!Well laid out, thumbnails load quickly
I have found that a free tube site only keeps people around if the site is well laid out. Well, Drtuber is certainly easy on the eyes! It is well organized, the layout of the site isn’t confusing, and the thumbnails load very quickly on each page. I was able to click on a video and have it load instantly. Once finished, I pressed back and went on to something else without experiencing any buffering or videos that hang while loading. This is also the case on the mobile side of things. It’s sleek, functional, and never a pain to use. A lot of free tube sites cannot make the transition to mobile but with Drtuber it’s designed exactly as the doctor ordered!Become a member to download videos and subscribe to users
Drtuber (often misspelled as "drtube") isn’t just a free tube site that only dips its little toe into a bucket of sensual ice water though: it also has a community of members that uploads videos regularly. Even if you don’t want to upload your own videos of females you want the world to uplift and compliment in the comments section you can still follow members that regularly upload videos and even download your favorites! I have actually begun to download some of my favorite videos. I put them in a playlist and randomize them all being sure to also put the playlist on repeat. It’s almost as if I’m not alone in mother’s basement but instead have the company of lovely females that love me for who I am. I love you all, ladies sitting inside of my computer. I wish you would nurse my tiny penis and give me the medicine I need for my trucker STD though.- Choose from straight, gay, or transsexual videos from the homepage
- Good sorting options
- Thumbnails and videos load quickly
- Mobile and desktop sites are well organized and easy to navigate
- Become a member to subscribe to users, upload videos, and even download videos for offline.
- Unsure what Drtuber Premium offers or how much it costs.
Find a better FREE porn tube site than DRTUBER.COM on PornGeek!
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