xHamster will always hold a special place in my heart. On nights when my waifu has a headache or just isn’t feeling it, it’s always there for me. Whether I’m in the mood for hentai (yeah, that’s right bitch, I don’t need you to be satisfied) or human women, it always has something to offer.Lately, I’ve developed an interest in the mysterious, exotic Arab women of the East. Daddy took me out to try falafel a few days ago and I made eye contact with a beautiful woman. At least, I’m fairly sure it was a woman—I couldn’t see much but her eyes, but I fell in love almost instantly. She screamed at me when I tried to look under her veil, but I still love her even though she called the police on me.The falafel was icky, by the way (I’ll stick to chicken), but the experience wasn’t a total waste of time. It introduced me to the wonderful experience that is Arab porn. They’re the perfect mid-point between black girls (sexy, but too intimidating for my gentle nature) and white girls (perfect for marriage, but not exciting enough to masturbate to all the time).The best source I’ve found for videos of sweet Muslim women is xHamster. This makes sense to me—it’s always been one of the best sources of amateur videos, and even brave Muslim heroes who have sex on camera have a lot of obstacles in front of them when it comes to making porn in their own countries.Thankfully, some of them have been kind enough. I’ll make sure their brave actions are not in vain by masturbating to xHamster’s Arab section a few times a day. It’s for them, honestly, I could stop whenever I want. I just don’t need to or want to, so stop asking. You’re sounding like my mom.
xHamster’s Pedigree of Porn
xHamster has been around for over a decade, making it practically ancient when compared to the come-and-go nature of so many websites these days. As one of the pioneers of showing girls the many advantages of uploading their sex tapes for the whole world to see, xHamster has managed to stockpile a collection of amateur Arab porn so great that even a sophisticated gentleman like myself has to recognize that they’ve built something special.They’ve even got some professional stuff, but it’s not as common as it would be in other subgenres. A lot of it is actually French, since the meanies in most Arab countries don’t like letting their beautiful women express themselves like we do here. Mommy and daddy like French food (even if I think it’s icky), but their porn is a bit better.For people who aren’t quite as brilliant as myself, xHamster even goes as far as to define Arab porn. I’m a pornography scholar so I didn’t even bother reading it, but if you’re less experienced you might want to take a look at it. I’m sure it’s very interesting and all, but I’m beyond such simple matters.
Finding My Exotic Wife
xHamster makes it easy to find what you’re looking for. It’s not a complicated layout, but that works in its favor. I’m a simple man—give me a pitcher of mountain dew, a plate of chicken fingers (with ketchup), and access to some good porn and I’ll be in heaven. xHamster’s Arab section gives me just that—and with how easy it is to use, it’s like I’ve got the same selection of girls that ThePornDude has, even if my access to them is strictly virtual.The layout of the site is comforting. It’s like my sweet baby girl of a pillow, not those blow-up harlots that have been seducing me lately. It’s an old favorite. Pull up the main Arab page and you’ll see standard thumbnails. Mouse over them for a preview of all the best parts, and when you find something you like, check to see if your doll is filled up, lube up (you wouldn’t want to hurt her), then get down to business. As long as you apologize to your true love after, it’s really not that bad.If you need to dig a little bit deeper, xHamster offers a few different sorting options. To start things off you’ll get the classic: featured videos. This is where you’ll find the xHamster staff’s top selections. I usually start (and finish here). Everybody cums when they take their cock out of their pants, right? It’s completely normal. The first second or two of a featured video normally does it.Sometimes, a really pretty girl will walk by my house and I’ll happen to see her with the high-definition camera that just happens to be pointed out of my window. On days like that, I like to pull up some more porn for round two or three… or five. When that happens, sometimes I like to add a little variety and sort by most viewed or most commented videos. Not everyone has the same refined taste that I do, but usually you can find some good stuff this way.Another option is sorting by new. New? More like ew. I leave this task to other less fortunate souls. I have a pillow and a side doll, I don’t need to resort to untested videos. Except, well… sometimes it can be fun to go gutter diving and see what you find. I’m usually far too good for that, but everyone needs a change in pace sometimes.If any random video of an Arab girl won’t float your boat, xHamster has filters and tags that let you narrow down on your own tastes. If you prefer younger girls that haven’t been defiled by the ravages of time and giant five-inch cocks, they’ve got a tag for teen girls. If you want a facsimile of mommy but with a little bit darker skin and a burka, you can look for Arab MILFS. They’ve even got some BBW Arab porn, even though I’m not sure how you could get fat in a land without mommy’s signature pizza bagels.One thing they don’t have is Arab hentai. I think this is a market that could easily be exploited. I’d start making some, but I don’t have… the time, that’s it. I’m a very busy man. An excellent artist, but I just have too much on my plate right now to devote my time to another side project. I’ll just let all of my dear readers take that tip for free—invest in Arab hentai, I’m sure it’s going to be the next big thing.They even have Arab cam girls! Not only are they pretty, but they need a lot of help, so be a good person and act as their white knight savior like I do. Some of the other guys were telling me that the stories this one girl was making up about the Taliban stopping her from learning to read was a lie, but I’m fairly sure that the few hundred dollars I send her each week is really making a difference. And she shows me her boobies every once in a while, so either way I’m coming out on top.
If you’re a suave gentleman like myself, check out the dating section. Right this section I’m chatting with ten different Arab girls, each of whom is devoutly dedicated to me and my body. These girls aren’t corrupted by Western media standards, so they don’t expect every guy to have a nice face, a six-pack, and a gigantic four-inch dick. You don’t have to be an alpha-male like ThePornDude to attract these girls, even average every-day men like me can find their Arab soulmate on xHamster.Just yesterday I sent a thousand dollars to one so that she can come over to visit me this weekend. She doesn’t have any pictures of herself, but with a name like Abdul she has to be cute. I can’t wait to see her and show her the ways of free American love. Why is the symbol next to her name blue, though? I always get those little things mixed up. Oh well. At least she promised she’ll be gentle.