It’s no fun to spend every single night of your life jacking off to busty babes and bukkake vids from the land of the rising sun. Sometimes you just need something a little bit different. For a two-pump-chump like myself, something different usually means finding a type of smut that will keep me occupied for more than 30 seconds at a time, because if I’m polishing my flagpole, I end up down, out and spent in under a minute.There’s no better immersive form of adult entertainment than porn games. Between triple-A porn titles, of which there are very few, to the single button flash animations of old, porn games have always had us coming back for more.Personally, when I’m browsing porn games I either get stuck on one game for a longer period of time, especially if it’s an RPG in which I get to roleplay as some sort of serial sex offender, or I’m playing pretend that I’m a busty nubile babe who’s getting around town. But not all porn games are made equal. Some of them flat out last no more than a minute at a time, but it never bothered me because porn games, unlike porn videos, occupy my hands - sometimes it’s both at a time, other times it’s a mouse + cock combo layout.Because I’m not jacking off throughout the experience, and instead I’m just sort of edging back and forth, I get a lot more value per erection, which means a lot to me, because I don’t really have much else to do with myself at the end of the day, before I inevitably switch to playing World of Warcraft.So before that time arrives, I’m playing WoW parodies in which I get to bang a sexy ass blood elf with a 20 inch draenei cock, over and over again, until I get bored of that game and swap to another in which I’m banging the chicks from Overwatch. With porn games, the fun never really stops.
Simple and Sexy
There are countless porn game sites out there, but few of them appeal to the pervert in me as much as PornGames.Com. They give me a strong ThePornDude vibe with their modern design, dedication to smut and generally respectful relationship with ads, but a bit more on that later. Let’s talk about the smut!All the games on PornGames.Com are worth your time, in varying doses. The site’s owners don’t really seem to have a particular preference in mind, as to the type of games that they host. You’ll find every type of game on here because of that. I think that they’re trying to stay as liberal as possible and fit as many games on here as possibly, hopefully growing their library to the largest porn game compendium on the web. They’re not quite there yet, they only have a few thousand games, and you can always find more elsewhere, but their library is far from modest. You’ve definitely got countless hours of content on here, and it’s all very varied.
From RPGs to Press X, Please
Ever since the advent of flash and the olden days of Newgrounds we’ve had some form of porn games, but none were as famous during the early days as the flash animations of chicks getting penetrated by monster cocks, letting you decide how fast they get fucked by repeatedly smashing a single button.We might have come a long way, but these games are still super popular for some reason. As a genre, I don’t like them very much, because they’re very simple. You’ve got a girl on screen mid-coitus and you get to choose from a selection of sexual positions for her to get plowed in. Maybe you can swap from vaginal to anal, and eventually cum warm buckets of cum inside her tight holes. But that’s about it. The fun pretty much stops there, and the animation resets.That’s why I don’t like these games as a genre, but I’m not complaining and here’s why. Once in a while, I’ll find a thrust-in-the-girl animation game like this featuring an animated girl that I happen to have a crush on, and it makes all the difference. I found one such game that let me thrust into Overwatch’s D.Va, over and over again, and I’ll admit, I’ve since pumped so many loads into her that I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s in a sex coma by now.On the other side of the coin, you’ve got the more enthusiastic games that reach for the stars. The real ThePornDude levels of smut worship that go above and beyond and even compete with modern triple-A titles in terms of how engaging and immersive they are.Granted, their graphics aren’t all that, but they let you roleplay your most extreme sexual fantasies at length. These games come with tens of hours of gameplay and even though they’re entirely in-browser, they save your progress to your PC using cookies, so that you can keep coming back to them, if you’ve gotten yourself hooked to a particular title. It’s amazing.These games range from medieval RPGs, to weirder stuff like modern detective games and even games that take place inside worlds that are entirely perverted, where everyone’s a rapist and everyone’s horny at the same time. It’s a dream come true. I mean don’t get me wrong - a strong-willed feminist like myself would never force himself onto a woman, but if I can do that inside a fantastical video game, well, that’s my kind of fetish, what can I say?
The Technical Stuff
PornGames.Com is a bit different from other similar porn sites. Most game hosting sites like this usually come with a ton of outdated design decisions and a myriad of computer infesting, cringe-inducing ads that you simply can’t get away from. Well, there’s none of that here. The site is crisp, cool and beautiful to look at. Ads are still there, but they don’t fly out of the fucking woodwork straight into your eyes, like dancing ladies on the corner of the screen that just refuse to fuck right off - I’m here for the drawn titties, dancing girls. I want drawn titties. Leave me alone dancing ladies. Put your clothes on and fuck right off!Anyways… the site lists countless games, that you naturally couldn’t possibly go through one by one, so it’s nice that there are detailed sorting options. You can sort by gameplay type and by genre, so if you’re looking for RPGs, then RPGs you will find. On the other hand, you can opt for, say, the all-time most popular games, or the highest-rated games if you’d like some community input and see what’s trending.One way or another you’re gonna end up on a game screen, devoted to staying out of your way while you’re enjoying yourself. Some of the games even let you go into full-screen mode, which is amazing considering that you’re playing them in a browser. Unfortunately, most of these games are made in Flash, which, as far as I’m concerned should have been buried over a decade ago, but alas, it helps people with very little experience in coding make sexy-ass games for you and me to enjoy.You’re gonna have to enable flash to enjoy them, but worry not, because unlike Java, Flash isn’t really known for being able to fuck your computer six ways to Sunday with viruses. And given that we’re living in the future, you shouldn’t experience any of the super laggy slowdowns we used to have with Flash back in the day.I would warmly recommend that you get one of those Flash-Game-Fullscreen plugins that are floating all over the web so that you can enjoy these games properly, without any compromise, especially if you’re going to sink more than half an hour into a single game. If you full-screen them they should feel more like actual full-fledged PC titles, rather than some sort of browser excuse for a game.I also recommend that you stick to Google Chrome, even though I know these days a lot of people have serious arguments for using Firefox and the like. I’m not saying that you can’t play these games in other browsers, but Chrome has given me the best results, consistently, so there’s my two-cents.So if you want to break away from tradition and jack off to something other than flesh and blood pussy, you’re gonna wanna hop onto PornGames.Com and check out their ever-growing selection of super immersive titles that’ll keep you hard for hours. Personally, I recommend the Rule 34 stuff featuring recognizable video game characters and RPGs that come with content that is thicker than a bowl of oatmeal