Lobster Tube! You know the term Chads use when they talk about stealing a female’s virginity away from them, ‘popping their cherry?’ By the way, how darned disgusting is that term? A female is more than a fruit, more than a trickle of blood, and certainly has more value than any Chad’s large, thick, and pulsating penis that females cannot help but ride. Perhaps when society becomes more enlightened and stops placing value on fleeting emotions like sexual attraction and beauty, I can actually find someone that wants to spend time with me rather than being repulsed.Well, my own cherry was popped this weekend. No not in my butthole or penal head but when it comes to eating lobster! I have always wanted to eat lobster but thought it was only reserved for royalty. But when I came across a cage full of lobsters on a bay, I ran back to mother’s house and proudly threw them on the table. For the first time ever, mother told me I, ‘did a good job.’Proudly strutting across the living room like I owned the place, she immediately got her geriatric fat buttocks off her recliner and began to work her lobster magic. Little did I know though of the horrors I would hear! Not only do you have to steam lobsters, but they also scream like children when being boiled alive!I threw the lobster pot out of the house, spraying the mailman with boiling water and essentially ruining his career. In a daze, I began giving these poor animals mouth-to-mouth resuscitation despite the claws of the lobsters squeezing my penis head ever so strongly. But it was no use: they had died a dishonorable death and it was all mother’s fault!I headed straight to the basement and began trying to find a potion or spell I could use to bring the lobsters back to life. But it was no use. I did find a porn aggregator called Lobstertube.com that helped me to put my mind at ease and do what I do best, though: complimenting beautiful females and sending the good vibes to them telepathically! You’re going to enjoy this new resource so come on: join me and let me show you the value white knights and male feminists are undoubtedly going to find in Lobstertube!
Over 42-million videos
When you load up Lobstertube for the first time, the one thing you are going to notice is just how many videos there actually are! In the search window, you will notice the actual number this porn aggregator has available for you to view. While the number is always increasing (because more videos are being added to the sources Lobstertube uses all the time) you can bet that you’re going to have access to at least over 42-million videos.
I can’t even imagine uplifting that many females. While I am absolutely always up for the challenge, 42-million unique videos is a huge number to wrap your head around. With videos being added all the time, would it actually be possible to watch every single thing Lobstertube has to offer? Probably not. You can try and may eventually die from internally combusting due to the energy it takes to telepathically praise ladies but it was an honorable death . A Viking’s death even!
Homepage lets you choose preferred sexual orientation
Although I only visit adult sites and especially porn aggregators to uplift and praise goddesses, we should always keep in mind of people on the other end of my spectrum. There are plenty of men and shemales out there that also want to telepathically uplift men and other shemales respectively, and Lobstertube makes it simple to let you do exactly this. Click on your sexual orientation at the top of the homepage, and you will see relevant content pertaining to your sexual orientation. If you’re gay, you don’t want to watch a Chad porking a beautiful female because they hate Chads at much as straight male feminists. Lobstertube gives you the option to skip these men entirely and focus on content more tailored to you.
Good thumbnails across the pages
One of the things that annoys me to no end is when a site’s thumbnails do not accurately show the contents of a video. You know what I’m talking about. A thumbnail shows a video of a beauty showing off her glossy seductive smile so you click on it hoping to see 20-minutes of a glorious female smiling and showing the world that she’s more than a pretty face with a tight bergina or big boobers. Yet you click on it and it’s 19-minutes of her slobbing on a Chad’s pee-pee he was given for being a winner in the genetic lottery. Just wait until you hit 40 and that erectile dysfunction starts setting in, Chad! Where will the ladies be then, Chad?!?I was pleased to say that Lobstertube isn’t guilty of any of this. When you see a thumbnail you get an authentic representation of what is being offered on the other side. Clicking a thumbnail brings you to a video that doesn’t feel like a bait-and-switch by any means: you always have a good indication as to what you are clicking on.The thumbnails are also very detailed. You won’t be squinting wondering what you are looking at or if that’s some female’s mole or just a coffee cup on the table behind her buttocks. No squinting, no guessing, you’re always going to know what to expect from a thumbnail before the jump.
Many categories to choose from
One of the things I have found that I love about porn aggregators the most is just how many categories they truly have. I suppose it makes sense when you think about it. With so many videos to choose from (over 42-million as stated) and tons of sources used to show you the lovely ladies you crave, it makes a lot of sense that there would be a lot of categories. Still, when you see how many categories Lobstertube provides it’s still insanely impressive just how many there are. There are categories for everyone and you’re going to see many that you’ve never seen on normal free tube sites. In fact, there are so many Lobstertube actually uses a search option to search across categories!
Can filter categories via search
You know you have a ton of categories to choose from when you have to offer a search option to make it easier to find them! Although it’s fun to browse around Lobstertube look through the massive wall list of categories, searching makes it simple to find exactly what you need. This is especially true if you already know what you are looking for. It’s a feature you don’t see everyday and it’s the perfect way. For example, when I typed in, ‘Asian,’ I was shown the search results, ‘busty Asian,’ and, ‘pregnant Asian,’ just to name a few.It’s a neat feature that makes it so convenient to search porn aggregators. It gives Lobstertube a true advantage over the competition and a feature I’d love to see in free tube sites eventually. If ThePornDude and I ever joined forces and created a porn aggregator unlike anything the world had ever seen, I know he would add this feature to the 4MaleFeminists aggregator for sure!
Good sorting options
There is so much good stuff to say about Lobstertube that silly-goose me didn’t even mention the good sorting options! Lobstertube allows you to sort results by popularity, quality, source, date, duration, and rating. It’s just a strong of a tool as their search-by-category tool and lets you find the videos you need so you can uplift the beauties that need the compliments. Try it out: you will be amazed at the results that come up!
View related categories at the bottom of a particular category
It seems that points thumbs at chest THIS male feminist cannot stop talking about the power of categories on Lobstertube (say, that would make a great book title if I ever wrote a how-to guide about telepathically complimenting females). The last thing I will say about Lobstertube’s amazing categories is this. On the bottom of each page on Lobstertube, you will notice that there are related categories based on the category you are looking at. So if the category in question isn’t really giving you the results you want, no problem! The related categories will point you in the right direction and open you up to new possibilities. Amazing!