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Horror Porn
HorrorPorn! I remember a few years ago a bunch of my friends got really deep into underground cinema. They’d unearth long-forgotten movies from the 70s and 80s, mostly scary or obscure stuff that freaked the ever-living hell out of me. These movies looked more like hour-long snuff flicks than artistic pieces, but something about them really caught my attention. Most of them had a lot of boobies on screen, for a long ass duration. Now personally, I’m not into weird shit, unless Japanese tentacle porn counts. I like seeing women pleasured, not scared or tortured. And while I do subscribe to the occasional BDSM website, I try to keep it clean most of the time.
That really wasn’t the case though when I discovered HorrorPorn. This website is one of those porn sites that you don’t just send to your friends in an e-mail, under the cover of darkness, so they can get a good jack-off session out of them like you did. This is the kind of shit you invite people over to your house to present because you feel like you found something really special.
Spooky Horny Skeletons
Just like those obscure horror flicks from the late 20th century, every smut film on HorrorPorn is a unique cinematic experience with a high budget and even higher aspirations. The entire website is built around the idea of making a horror movie and pushing it into full-on XXX hardcore penetration. It’s like when you watch an old scary movie that has an innocent girl lose her clothes to a scary monster, and then they cut to black with a scream. The girl dies and you don’t get to see her chest again. Sure, that shit’s arousing, but it’s mostly about giving you a half-chub while you’re focused on the scary stuff. Salma Hayek was really bangable in From Dusk Till Dawn, but you can’t possibly jack off to her striptease scene, because you’d have to also jack it to George Clooney, and the whole thing lasts about 2 minutes before they get to the zombie shooting portion of the movie. Now, if you’re me you might just get away with a quick fap, because I am after all a two-pump chump with a 2-incher that quits before the action starts, but if you’re a real man, like say, ThePornDude, you’re gonna have trouble jacking your old dick off to sexy scenes in horror movies. Right as the titties get revealed, some zombie has to jump into the scene to fuck everything up. The violent part of horror kills the boner. HorrorPorn has figured this out, and you can tell that they started the website with a deep passion and love for horror movies, but specifically for the parts where the Selma Hayeks of the horror world take their clothes off.Monsters and Demons and Zombies, Oh My!
HorrorPorn make long ass porn videos with really hot pornstars, with a very simple premise. They take a horror cliché, like a standard slasher flick setup, or a zombie horde movie, and they sexify it to the max. So when the zombies come, they really come, over and over again, while they’re being fucked by some guy who is there to save the day. There are even a ton of porn parodies of famous movies, and those have been around for a long time, but usually, a porn parody means that the pornstars will be wearing the outfits that the characters wore in the movie, and just do a sex scene like nothing else matters. That shit’s immersion-breaking from the start. HorrorPorn is the kind of scary porn site that even ThePornDude would recommend. Take their parody of the recent Nun movie, which they have dubbed “Damned Nun”. It’s short, only 11 minutes in length, but the set pieces, outfits, makeup and special effects all follow the art style used in the actual horror movie that you saw at the cinema. There’s a possessed demon nun, complete with terrifying makeup and acting, sexually torturing the ever-loving shit out of the innocent main character. Just like that you’ve got a high quality lesbian sex scene, with elements of BDSM, straight-up torture porn, horror and after the priest gets involved, amazing threesome action. It’s the whole package and then some.High-Class Monsters
What really separates HorrorPorn from other similar sites is the quality and the distance they go to replicate the triple-A horror feel. This is not your average parody site. Every single scene on this website looks as good as the movie it’s parodying. And in the case of their original content, shit gets really fucked up in real high quality. They film with really high-quality cameras, in full 4K, and they hire as many actresses as they could possibly need to make you feel like this might actually be a Hollywood production with hardcore penetration, rather than some sort of back alley parody. In one of their productions dubbed “The Beast From the Woods” they’ve got an entire handful of women bound and gagged like animals, completely naked, in a filthy barn. They filmed during the day, so the lighting is absolutely amazing, and before you call me a nerd for praising the lighting in a porn movie let me just say this: The better the lighting, the better you can see their pussies. So my point is, whether the setup calls for the girls to have rabbit teeth, or three breasts instead of two, or for them to be completely naked in the woods and covered in mud, HorrorPorn will go way out of their way to fulfill your wildest horror fantasies without holding back.What About the Penetration?
I should probably talk about the actual types of sex you can expect to see on the site. After the scene is set up and you’ve gotten your fill of the horror section, you want to see these girls get plowed – and boy do they get plowed. There’s a ton of hardcore vaginal and anal action, with more than enough lesbian pussy eating and asshole licking. The girls are all absolutely gorgeous, though I haven’t seen any recognizable faces so far. I guess triple-A pornstars either don’t want to do niche porn or their acting chops aren’t up to par. After all, a lot of these girls have to actually play dead for the corpse fucking scenes. – Yes, there are tons of corpse fucking scenes and they’re eerily realistic. I’m a little sad about the fact that there’s way too much focus on the standard vaginal penetration – it’s like 80% of the actual sex that you see on screen – but you can skip around the videos if you’re not entertained so to each his own.The Website and Quality
Here’s where HorrorPorn takes a bit of a hit, at least from my review, because they kind of dropped the ball. They obviously spent most of their budget on the set pieces and the pornstars, because I doubt a lot of money went towards their web developers. The website looks great, style-wise, because there’s literally nothing on it except for the videos. Sure, there’s a search bar, and you can use it to look up titles or tags, but there’s no way to see all the tags in one list. You’d have to search for a tag, see if it exists, open a video that has it, then click the tag and see all the other videos that match. It’s annoying as hell. They also have absolutely no pages for their models, so if you like seeing a particular girl play pretend like she’s a corpse in a madman’s dungeon, tough luck – because you can’t find her in another video even if you try. You’d have to literally luck into her pussy in another video, another day.Conclusion
HorrorPorn is the website to have a subscription on if you’ve ever gotten hard while watching a horror flick. If you’ve ever wanted the sexy scenes in scary movies to be just a little bit longer so you can get off, this is the site for you. They’re devoted to their craft, they make new videos regularly and they’re extremely affordable. They can bill you monthly, every 90 days and every 180 days, the last of which will cost $129.95, or roughly $21 a month. That is a bit of a steep price for a porn site, but keep in mind you’re also getting a Hollywood level cinematic production. They don’t just pay the pornstars, they’ve got an entire team working hard to immerse you in the terrifying universe of HorrorPorn.- Dedication to realistic Horror Porn
- Hot ass pornstars
- 4K high definition quality and speed
- Obsession with vaginal penetration
- Lazy sorting and lack of categories
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